Friday, March 03, 2006

Sometimes David Gregory Just Thinks Funny Things

Today my love for David Gregory went through the roof as I giggled with him through his brief interview on Imus.* It's true, sometimes you do just think funny things. I used to crack up over the word "ganong." Ha, it still works.

What also works: the power of suggestion. I'm not talking about my eerily prescient dramatic rendering of Gregory, drunk and hurting — that's a made-up story, boys and girls. Also a made-up story: that Gregory was drunk. I'm not saying he didn't sound drunk, or like drunk people we've known (or been). But beyond the fact that that's a fairly damning allegation, it didn't make sense. For one thing, he was calling into Imus before dinner, India time. What, he found a pub and spent the afternoon chilling over a cold one? Highly unlikely. Also, once he mastered the giggles, his description of the U.S.-India nuclear deal was incredibly lucid and succinct, which apparently characterized his follow-up call to Imus (mysteriously not mentioned on Drudge). TVNewser called it a non-scandal; Gregory didn't even think to mention it on his subsequent posts on the Daily Nightly.

But, who cares — the power of suggestion/blatant implication is way more fun. Tabloid headline writers know that they can weasel out of libel with a well-placed question mark ("Did Jessica Cheat?" Brit Pregnant — Again?"); Drudge knows that trick, too. I don't know what his headline was after Dick Cheney had a beer at lunch and then shot his friend in the face; I'm guessing it wasn't "Dick Cheney Shot His Friend In The Face Because He Was 'Drunk'?" From Imus to Drudge to drunk dial jokes, the path was too easy. NBC denies it, of course, but would they need to had Drudge mentioned Gregory's sober-sounding second call? Keep in mind that a proper journalist would have made an effort to contact Gregory or NBC for comment, which surely could have answered his interrogatory. These are obviously hypothetical questions; obviously Drudge isn't going to make that call, he's not in the benefit-of-the-doubt business. But really, he should have, just as he should update and clarify his story today to reflect NBC's denial. We'll see. In the meantime, David Gregory, I'll see you between the moon and New York City. Ganong!

UPDATE: No update. Friday, March 3, 2006, 11:06 am ET — nothing on the main site or yesterday's newsflash. In other news, my eyes are very angry at me for making them look at the Drudge Report. How is that site so popular? Red-state optometrists, credit where credit is due.

Drunk David Gregory Still Smarter Than You [Wonkette]

*Rejected headline for this post: "Imus? But He Doesn't Even Know Us!"